InBabel @InBabel@writing.exchange

The past year has been an emotional roller-coaster, I have successfully completed my first year as a student nurse, 2nd year begins in just under 4 weeks. It has been full of experiences most of which I can only discuss in vague terms or not at all. I am acutely aware that nurses have a professional responsibility to respect the right to privacy of the people who we care for. A responsibility I take very seriously. With that in mind... Fam, let me tell you, it has been wild.

Absolute scenes, downpour while waiting for my train and I managed to get one soaking wet leg. I remain warm and dry everywhere else.

I need a standby switch for my brain, I got an hour’s sleep lst night because the anxious predictions of catastrophe just would not stop.

Being transgender has never been “abnormal.” Inventing a whole branch of social science and psychiatry to turn something that isn’t a problem, into one, is definitely not normal.

How up in arms would they be if we called them gynephyllic cissexual, autoandrophyllic cissexual. If we applied the same scrutiny to cisgender people we could invent a whole new lexicon for imaginary pathologies, applied to people just going about their day.

I spend too long thinking about the arguments people make against transgender women. Its difficult to avoid when it’s your life. My current excursion into it is the sheer amount of scrutiny trans people’s lives are subjected to. Its fun reading about who you are supposed to be, and not recognising the person being described. And all the categories they invent. “Homosexual Transsexual” Androphyllic transsexual, gynephillic, autogynephillic et cetera.

Lecturer this morning used the phrase "If acute kidney injury isn't noticed quickly, death can eventuate."

And now I keep thinking "Eventuating Death" would be a great metal band name.

Ideally that should have had a comma after No.

Its not much of a revelation to say anything transphobes have to say has no value, but the flip side is trying to prove that trans women are biologically female is equally pointless. Neither argument matters. They don't usefully describe the experience of the individual, which is the good stuff in my opinion. The same way being born with a cervix doesn't describe the experience of being a cis woman. Sorry for the essay.

Woke up thinking about the argument that says “Trans women are men.” It doesn’t matter a fig what someone’s chromosomal sex is, and transphobes know that. The entire assertion “trans women are male” is about power and control. The response “No trans women are biologically female” is a way of reasserting control over our experience. Its a neverending game of ping pong.

I only mention it, because I had cis women friends who went at the time, and qualified, while my life and “career” took a more patchwork route. I remind myself of that when I think about why I am still scraping by compared to my cis peers from that time. When doors are closed, it often has life long effects.

I may have recounted this before, I first considered trying to go to nursing school before I had grs, but after I had transitioned. I spoke to a few people who told me that “transsexuals are not welcome at nursing school.” The reasoning back then was that we were the patients, not the professionals. Nursing training in the UK was transformed between 2009 - 2013, when BSc’s became the norm, and universities entirely replaced hospital based nursing schools.

I’m fairly sure I have everything ready for class in the morning, which usually means I’ve missed something essential.

How do people have the time and energy to run youtube channels?

I am craving a margarita.