Stephanie<p>Estrangement grief is strange—it doesn’t always hit in the ways you expect. Today, it showed up as decision paralysis over something as small as picking clothes. Beneath that was something deeper: the weight of making choices alone, without the invisible guide rails of family influence.</p><p>Growing up, decisions were made for me. Even as an adult, I sought their approval, even when I didn’t want to. Now that they’re gone, every decision feels final—fully mine. That freedom should feel empowering, but instead, it stirs fear. What if I get it wrong? What if I make a stupid mistake?</p><p>The waiting, the uncertainty, the lingering belief that I should know how to handle this by now—it all pulls at old survival responses. Fear. Anxiety. Shame. A younger part of me still craves external validation, but I don’t yet know what self-approval looks like.</p><p>I do know I’m in transition. Learning to trust myself. Learning to let go of the shame of old responses. I’ve already taken steps forward. Now, the real work is defining what self-approval means—and making peace with the parts of me that still reach for something that no longer exists.</p><p><a href="https://caneandable.social/tags/Estrangement" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Estrangement</span></a> <a href="https://caneandable.social/tags/Grief" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Grief</span></a> <a href="https://caneandable.social/tags/SelfTrust" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>SelfTrust</span></a> <a href="https://caneandable.social/tags/Healing" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Healing</span></a></p>